Joe’s #2: I Hate You. Don’t Leave Me

This book was first recommended to me to by one of my professors in my Counseling program.  I find that while her and I agree on the bigger issues we often nuance it differently.

This book is no different. I found it to be a quick read (less than two days) and I will probably re-read sections again and there were sections that I outright dismissed and will probably never visit again. It deals with the issue of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD).
A little outdated (the book still refers to the DSM-III and we’re about to get #5), this book evokes strong reactions from both those who suffer from BPD and those who strive to treat it. I like that fact.

A little controversy is never a bad thing and this book proves that once again. This book does a good job of giving an overview of BPD and what it is like to live with someone who has it and love that person.  People who are living with someone who has BPD, will find some good insights in the book.  I also like the fact that the author does put the responsibility for a person’s actions on their own shoulders although I’d like to see this more nuanced in the book.

A few negatives are the date of the book, which is not the books fault and also is probably a contributing factor to the relative inexpensive price tag.  One con for me on this book is that he essentially says that BPD is untreatable. This was a commonly held belief in the field when BPD was first diagnosed. That has changed over the last 20 years.

All in all, I would say this a good book for someone who wants to become more familiar with what BPD is and how to live with someone who has it.  There are other books out there that are better at it from a scientific point of view. Of course, they also come with a much higher price tag.


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